Once and again
by gsrfan1
Summary: Summary: Long before they became ‘roomies,’ their paths had crossed before, will a visitor from the past make Ray realise what he always had but never saw or will the secrets he uncovers destroy everything before he has the chance.
1. Chapter 1

Title: Once and Again

Author – Gsrfan

Summary: Long before they became 'roomies,' their paths had crossed before, will a visitor from the past make Ray realise what he always had but never saw or will the secrets he uncovers destroy everything before he has the chance.

Pre-season 13: Gates doesn't exist

Disclaimer: I do not own Ray, Neela or anything associated with ER.

Rating: M (nothing particularly graphic but this fic does contain mature themes)

A/N: This story is AU as it assumes that they went to the same med – school, even though we know they didn't. Some chapters are based around the events of actual episodes, so you may recognise some of the quotes; they're just to set the scene and I've tried to add as much narration as possible so you're not just reading the scene as it aired.

Chapter 1

"Right and the drug look up…….?"

"Barnett?" Neela asked as a familiar voice drifted through the trauma room,

"Rasgotra," the smartly dressed man before her grinned, making her melt the way he always had.

'**Don't go there Neela,**' she warned herself.

"You guy's know each other?" Abby asked curiously,

"Yeah," the new guy said, "you stalking me again Rasgotra?"

"Think again. I was here first genius." Neela retorted more sharply than she intended, he always managed to rile her without meaning to.

"You miss me?" he asked, as cocky as ever,

"Of course," Neela said putting on a sickly sweet smile, "but at this distance I'm sure my aim will improve."

"I see you haven't lost your incredible wit," the man so far only known as Barnett smiled,

"_You_ seem to have lost your dress sense though," Neela smirked, "What's with the get-up?"

"You don't like it?" he grinned,

"It's not really you," she said remembering the things he used to wear, or rather what he didn't wear. Ray Barnett wasn't known for being shy, Neela fought to hide a blush at all the times he had walked around the apartment half naked.

"Sorry to interrupt the reunion," Abby smiled, "but is anyone going to fill me in?"

"Sorry," he smiled reaching out his hand, "Ray Barnett…… Neela's ex."

Neela choked on the air she was breathing causing Ray to laugh as he shook Abby's hand,

"Ex ….roommate that is," he clarified, "that was until she ran out on us without even a note to say good bye."

'**Please don't bring that up now!**' Neela thought biting her lip,

"Us?" Abby asked,

"Yeah, there was four of us, Neela was the lucky one, sharing with three drop dead gorgeous guys," he smiled, winking at Neela.

"Really?" Neela asked, "Why didn't you guys tell me? I would have loved to meet them." She teased trying to hide the nervousness in her voice. Now wasn't the time to bring up the past, in fact there would never be a good time.

"Funny." He smiled, "So why _did_ you run out on us?"

'**Think, think, can't tell the truth, think of a lie,**' her mind raced as they both looked at her expectantly.

"I uh….. couldn't hide my undying love for you anymore Ray, it was too much for me." She said,

'**Good, deflect with sarcasm, that'll work.'**

"Well, I'm glad you're finally admitting it," he said, recognising the look in her eyes, she was hiding something. When they first met he wouldn't have cared enough find out what, but now he knew better than to try, she had one hell of a temper when she wanted to.

"Well," he said rubbing his hands together, "this trip down memory lane has been fun, but I better get back to work, don't want to loose my job on the first day now do I? Nice to meet you," he said to Abby before he walked away.

Neela let out a deep sigh as he walked away,

'**Why here? Of all the places he could have gone, he had to choose here!'**

"He seems nice," Abby said,

"Sure," Neela answered not really paying attention,

"What? You don't like him?" Abby asked confused, she'd thought they were friends,

"Yeah, sure I do." Neela smiled, "It's just when it comes to Ray and my past …. It's difficult. I don't want to talk about it." She added as Abby started to speak,

"Fair enough," Abby smiled as she stared her coffee, she knew there was no point pushing the issue, Neela could be stubborn when she wanted to be.

Neela looked down the hallway and sighed, it was good to see him again but she always felt like a love sick school girl when she was around him and if he ever found out about what had happened back then things would never be the same for her.

'**This is going to be interesting.'**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

**A/N: I know this chapter is short and pretty much what aired but I need it to be so it works, but I have added narration and the rest of the chapters are more original.**

"What's up?" Ray asked Neela as she stood at the nurses desk circling ads in the paper.

"Not much just worried about Abby," she sighed, "and I have to find a new apartment."

"Abby's coming back today right?" Ray asked as he contemplated telling her about his spare room,

"I've missed her... what.. I ha.. I have." Morris said as they gave him dubious looks,

"Well I just got a two bedroom sublet on North and Oakley for just a thousand a month." Ray said looking down at her as her as they stood side by side, their height difference accentuated as she looked down at the newspaper, "Yeah, but my roommate just flaked out on me so..." he said leaving his intentions to her interpretation,

"Oh, back in rehab huh?" Pratt joked

"You wouldn't happen to be interested in um..." he continued ignoring the re-hab jibe from behind him,

"You mean you and me?" she asked uncertainly, remembering what kind of roommate he was,

"Mmm... five hundred's better than a grand." He offered sensing her uncertainty,

"Thanks, I'll think about it" Neela said before he walked away, but with no intention of actually doing it,

'**I'm not _that_ desperate!'**

**X X XX**

"No windows at all? Shared bathroom, is that even legal here?" Neela asked incredulously, "Well, how much a month?" she asked before slamming the phone down in disgust,

"Oh, it's ugly out there." Ray smirked as Neela looked at him

'**Maybe I _am_ that desperate.'**

"You usually do early shifts right so you can go for gigs with your band?" she asked despite her better judgement,

"Yeah, yeah, and if you stick to your late shifts and your overnights..." Ray smiled knowing that he had her,

"Weeks could go by and we might never see each other..." Neela said knowing that that wouldn't last long. Ray couldn't stick to a schedule if you super glued it to him.

"Months, even..." he said stretching out his hand, "welcome, roomie!" he beamed as his hand closed around hers,

'**God her skin is soft!'**

'**Let go Neela,**' she told herself not wanting to do it,

"God, I'm gonna regret this." She sighed as Ray walked away, knowing that if she moved back in with him, she was in great danger……… great danger of falling head over heels in love all over again.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

"Ray!!" Neela yelled from the living room startling Ray who was lying in bed,

"What?" he mumbled rubbing his eyes, Neela just stared back at him with _a 'you have got to be kidding' _look on her face,

"Right," Ray said as he took in the mess formally known as their living room, "I was gonna….."

"Change the record Ray, you've been playing that for almost a year," Neela said walking into the kitchen, fed up of his excuses,

'**I should have known he couldn't change.'**

"Look," he said running a hand across his chest, "I'm sorry about the mess ok. You weren't supposed to be home until later, I really _was_ going to do it this time."

"Sure you were," she said rolling her head back trying to ease the ache there, "I've lived here for what…… 9 months? You haven't cleaned a thing since I moved in."

Neela smiled wryly as she thought about how dirty her _mind_ had become since she had moved in too. Ray's attire or lack of it wasn't really helping to clean it up either.

Ray fluttered his eyes and pouted his lips the way he always did when he wanted to get his own way,

"No way," she said shaking her finger at him, "That's not getting you out of it this time, I'm going for a shower and I expect this place to be spotless when I get back."

"You're going to have to take a very, very long shower then," Ray said as he surveyed the enormous task before him."

"Oh I intend to," Neela smiled as she closed the bathroom door,

Ray ran a hand through his hair and looked at the floor trying to concentrate,

'**How am I supposed to clean now?'** he thought as images of Neela in the shower invaded his mind distracting him, the sound of the water running only making concentration, not to mention other things harder.

'**Clean!**' he told himself sternly, **'Now!'**

XXXX

"Not bad," Neela said from the bathroom doorway, her words talking about the living room but her eyes and her mind admiring his body as he leaned over picking up beer cans.

"Thanks," he smiled, "I try."

"You certainly do," she teased. "What?" she asked as Ray stared at her,

"You always get dressed in the bathroom," he stated, "You don't trust me or something?" he joked,

"Of course I do," she smiled,

'**I'd just die of embarrassment if you ever caught me in a towel'** her mind added,

"At least I _get_ dressed," she grinned purposefully looking Ray up and down,

He smiled and winked at her, "You know you love it really,"

"Dream on," she swallowed hard,

'**I will.**' He thought walking into the kitchen,

"Hey, you remember Jack and Matt?" he asked picking up the coffee pot,

"Unfortunately," Neela said tensing slightly, the mention of her ex-roommates ruining the moment they just had.

"Well, they're going to be in the city next week. I said we'd meet up with them, go for a drink."

"Great," Neela unenthusiastically as she took the coffee he was offering,

"You don't sound too thrilled about that," he said,

Neela waved her hand and opened her mouth to refute it, but she knew it was no use, they both knew it wouldn't be true.

"I just never knew them that well in the first place Ray, I'd just be tagging along, you should go without me."

'**And I want to avoid them at all costs!'**

"There's more to it than that isn't there?" Ray asked, she had that look that told him that what she was saying wasn't all there was to be said.

"No," she lied, "I just wouldn't fit in. I'm gonna go get some sleep, goodnight."

"Goodnight," he said as she walked away from him, leaving him alone to ponder all the things that could be bothering her.

'**What is going on with her?'**


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

"Dr Barnett?" an ominous sounding voice said from behind Ray, who widened his eyes and gave Neela an '_oh crap, what did I do now look,_' as he slowly turned around,

"Jack?" he breathed relaxing his shoulders as he saw his friend, "Are you trying to give me a heart attack?"

"Sorry buddy," Jack laughed, "It was too good an opportunity to pass up."

"How are you?" he said pulling his friend into the shortest hug that could still be called a hug,

"Good," he smiled as he saw Neela, "Neel?" he said, "didn't expect to see you here."

"Hey," she half-smiled, silently fuming inside, she hated the nickname he had given her, apparently it had made her 'one of the boys'.

"Where's Matt?" Ray asked not noticing the way Neela shifted uncomfortably,

"Getting coffee," Jack said, "So when do you guys get off? We can go for a drink."

"I'm out of here in ….. 12 minutes." He said checking his watch,

"Two hours," Neela said,

"Great," Jack smiled, "we'll wait for you,"

"Oh there's no need," she said, brushing them off, "I'm pretty tired and just want to go home."

"Oh come on Neel," Jack insisted, "It'll be just like old times,"

"Then you shouldn't invite me then," Neela said bitterly, memories of being left out still stinging her.

"Oooh "Jack grinned playfully at Neela's angry gaze, "Is it just me or did it just get icy in here?"

"Come on Rasgotra, it'll be fun!" Ray said, trying to encourage her but not wanting to push it. She had been distant ever since he had told her they were coming, if it pushed it too far she might stay that way.

'**Rasgotra?**' Neela thought, the way he had reverted to using her last name not going unnoticed, he always had to fit in with the others,

"I said no _Barnett_, and my name is Neela, not Neel, not Rasgotra, Neela ok?"

"We used to call you that all the time," Jack said,

"Yeah, and I didn't like it then either," Neela deadpanned,

Ray was about to make a witty comment about how her name _was_ technically Rasgotra but her 'don't mess with me' look silenced him,

"Look Neela I'm….." Ray started but was cut off,

"Starting the reunion without me?" a voice said from the doorway,

'**Matt!'** Neela thought repulsively, **'My cue to leave.'**

"Well, you guys have a nice night, Ray I'll see you at home." she said before walking away as fast as she could without running,

'**What was that about?'** Ray thought, Neela wasn't usually rude like that,

"Something I said?" Matt asked, Ray just shrugged,

"Home?" Jack asked,

"Oh yeah, Neela and I are roommates again." Ray explained,

"With benefits I hope," He smiled,

"What?" Ray said choking, "It's not like that, and we're just friends."

"Too bad," Matt said, "You don't know what you're missing." Ray cringed, the thought of Matt and Neela together was one that he didn't need. It was no secret that they were more than friends but he didn't need to hear it, the image made him feel sick and insanely jealous.

"Oh yeah," Matt carried on, "she may be plain on the outside, but in the bedroom, wow! She……."

"Could you not talk about her like that please," Ray said defensively, firstly Neela _wasn't_ plain and secondly she wouldn't appreciate her love life being aired in public,

"I was just joking," Matt said, "a few years ago you would have laughed,"

"Well things change," Ray said,

Jack smiled knowingly, apparently a lot of things _had_ changed and if he wasn't mistaken his friend was ever so slightly in love.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

"So, how longs it been?" Jack asked as he and Ray sat at their table,

"Since what?" Ray asked,

"Since you fell in love with a certain ex-roommate of ours…..or should I say current in your case, you just couldn't seem to stay away."

"I'm not in love with Neela," Ray said choking on his beer, "I'm not," he said at Jack's unconvinced face, "I'm not, I mean ……….. yeah okay I am." He gave in as Jack stared him down.

"Well finally," Jack smiled, "I never thought I'd see the day that Ray Barnett fell in love, especially not with Neela Rasgotra."

"Why what's wrong with Neela?" Ray asked indignantly,

"Absolutely nothing, she's smart, beautiful, funny, extremely sarcastic _now_ it seems, and far too good for the likes of you," Jack teased,

"Oh well thanks very much," Ray said sarcastically, "Why didn't you expect _me_ to fall in love with her?"

"Well she's not exactly your type is she? I mean, not only does she have a mind of her own, but boy does she know how to use it."

Ray had to agree there, his past girlfriends, not that one-night stands could really be called that hadn't been known for their intelligence.

"She's never gonna go out with me." Ray said, "Not after the way we used to treat her. Looking back, I have no idea how she put up with us for so long, we were so rude to her, if we weren't ignoring her, we were teasing her. We must have made her life hell."

"I know, after she left, I went up to her, tried to apologise but she wouldn't have it." Jack said, "She was really mad."

"Same here." Ray said causing Jack to smile, "What?" Ray asked,

"_You_ didn't try Ray, if you had she would have welcomed you back with open arms," Jack explained even though he thought he shouldn't have needed to.

"What are you talking about?"

"You're not being serious?" Jack asked in surprise, "Okay maybe you are. Neela had the biggest crush on you, you didn't see that."

"No way," Ray said in surprise, "she would never……

"She would and she did," Jack insisted, "You ever find out why she left?"

"No," Ray said a hint of worry in his voice, the fact that she wouldn't tell him made him fear what it could be, "she clams up every time I mention it or evades the question with a sarcastic comment. She's hiding something but I don't know what, or even whether I deserve to know."

"So are you gonna tell her how you feel?" Jack asked, feeling the need to spur his friend along, if left to him nothing would get done.

"I don't know how, like you said she's too good for me." Ray said dejectedly,

"I was just messing around," Jack smiled, he had never seen Ray so smitten,

"But you were right,"

"I know I only saw her for five minutes today, but from what I saw, she still likes you just as much as she always did." Jack said hoping to cheer Ray up, "But unlike before, if you want her, you're going to have to show her. She may have been naïve enough to like you despite the fact that you ignored her back then, but right now, it's not gonna happen, there a million guys out there who would kill to have a woman like her.

"Well let's hope none of them are in Chicago," Ray said dryly as he stood up from the table, "You mind if I call it a night? It's been a long day and I have a lot on my mind. I'll make it up to you tomorrow,"

"Sure." Jack said raising his beer to him, "Good luck."

"Thanks," Ray smiled, "I hope I have more luck than him," he said motioning to Matt who was getting knocked back on the dance floor….repeatedly.

"Oh don't worry about him," Jack smiled, "He never takes no for an answer."

"Guess not all things change after all," Ray said as he headed towards the exit, not knowing what to do now that things had changed. He was on uncommon ground and it scared him.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Pushing the door closed slowly so as not to wake Neela, he was startled as her voice greeted him from the sofa. He walked up to it and saw her lying there as he looked over the top of it. She was lying on her back reading, her body accentuated to its best by the position she was in.

'**Stop thinking like that,'** he told himself,

"You're up late." By way of a greeting,

"Yeah," she agreed looking at the time as she sat up, "old habits die hard I guess."

"What do you mean?"

"Nothing," she smiled,

"Come on roomie, it's not nice to keep secrets," he teased, nudging her playfully as he sat next to her,

"Ok, you're gonna think I'm stupid though,"

"Try me." He smiled,

"When we lived together before I used to wait up for you, sad huh?" she said feeling embarrassed,

"Why?" he asked as she started to get up,

"Because I was a loser with no life of my own," she joked wishing this was over,

"You had a life," he said to her,

"But I _was_ a loser?" she asked playfully noticing that he didn't dispute that bit,

"No….no I….." he stumbled,

'**Great way to start Ray, insulting her is really going to convince her to date you!'**

"It's ok, I was just joking," she smiled walking to her room.

"Why really?" he asked following her, not believing her reason, he was getting better at knowing when her sarcasm was genuine and when it was shielding something else.

"It's stupid," she said as she reached her door,

"I don't care." He said not giving up,

"Okay," Neela said walking back to the sofa, "One night I was up late studying….. image that," she joked earning a smile from Ray, "and you came home. You were covered in blood; you'd been in a fight or fallen or something. You never did tell me, not in words I could understand anyway."

Ray smiled again, he wasn't the most eloquent person when sober, he could only imagine what a drunken version of himself was like.

"So, you had a cut on your head and another one on your hand," she said reaching out to him and softly tracing the scar that was there,

"I always wondered where that came from, I mean I woke up one day and my hand was bandaged and I never really knew why. I just assumed I'd done it the night before." He said, trying not to sigh as she held her hand in his,

"You were my first patient," she smiled, "I did the best I could," she said gliding a finger across the scar, "but considering that we were all med-students, our first aid kit was a disgrace." She joked, "You didn't have a concussion or anything, but you were pretty wasted,"

Ray smiled grimly, _'pretty wasted,'_ practically summed up his entire med-school experience,

"If I hadn't have been up," Neela continued, "we would never have known you were home, let alone hurt. You could have passed out and bled to death and no-one would have known."

Ray raised his eyebrows at her mockingly and closed his hand tightly as he felt the loss of her warm hand in his,

"Okay, so that was a little overdramatic," she conceded, "I doubt you would have _actually_ died, but anyway I fixed you up and sent you to bed, and every night after that I waited for you…..just encase." _'you needed me' _her mind added.

Being needed by Ray Barnett, for anything, was all a much younger, much shyer and much more love struck Neela Rasgotra had ever wanted. She was older and more confident now, not quite so love struck but she would still give anything for him to need her, to want her.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he asked,

"There was no need to, neither one of us would've gained anything from it and you probably would have forgotten ten minutes after I told you anyway." She added, a hint of cynicism creeping into her voice despite her attempts to hide it,

"Yeah," he sighed ruefully, never having regretted the past so much in his life than he did at that moment, "well I guess I owe a thank you."

"No need, I'll just charge you next time," she smiled playfully as she walked towards her room,

"Neela…." Ray called out, she had made her confession, now it was his turn,

"Yeah," she asked her voice sounding hopeful,

"Nothing." He said backing out, "goodnight."

"Goodnight Ray," she smiled disappointedly as she shut her door. The night was ending for her, but only just beginning for Ray as he contemplated how to make his next move.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Neela rubbed the back of her neck wearily as she put her key in the lock; her worst day ever had been knocked of its pedestal today. Nothing could compete with the chaos that had taken over the ER today.

She stopped short as unusual smell came from the apartment….. the smell of … food. She couldn't remember the last time either of them had actually eaten at home.

"Hey," she said as she put her bag down on the floor.

Ray was standing in the kitchen with his back to her so she took the time to survey the apartment. It was lit only by candles, soft music coming from the stereo, the table set for two…… **'Two.'** She thought, **'and I make three, so much for relaxing tonight.' **Listening to Ray and the flavour of the week wasn't what she'd planned.

"Hey roomie," he smiled as he turned to face her weary form, "here." He said handing her a glass of wine, "sit down, you look exhausted."

Puzzled Neela did as he said, he was right, she was exhausted.

"Dinner will be ready in about ten minutes." He said pottering around the kitchen,

"Right," Neela said standing, "I'll get out of your way."

"What?" he asked turning to face her, "You don't want to eat with me?" he said putting on his best puppy dog eyes.

"The table's only set for two," she said putting her wine down, "I'm sure your date doesn't want me hanging around."

"What date?" he asked confused,

"The one you left work early and did all this for." She said as though it was obvious.

Ray just laughed and walked up to her,

"I did this for _you_," he said his voice barely a whisper,

"Why?" she asked, having no idea what he was up to. This wasn't at all like him.

"So many reasons." He smiled, "to say thankyou and sorry."

"What for?"

"Everything I should've said it for in the past." He said looking in her eyes, "look, dinner will be ready really soon. You go and relax, get changed, lie down, whatever, then we'll have dinner and I'll explain everything."

"Ok," she smiled still slightly taken aback by her roommates transformation. Ray wasn't inconsiderate, well not all the time, but she had never seen him be this thoughtful before.

Watching her walk to her room he braced himself, this was the night, he was going to say it and for the first time he was going to mean it.

XXXX

"So?" Neela asked as the meal came to an end, "what's all this for?"

"I just wanted to show you that I can be a good roommate and say sorry for the way I used to treat you." Ray said, trying to work up the courage to say the rest.

"That's it?" Neela asked sceptically, "you could have just said it, you didn't need to go to so much trouble."

"I know, I just thought it would be nice," he said silently cursing his cowardice, the moment had gone, he couldn't say it now.

"It was," she smiled, "Thanks,"

"I really am sorry for the way that we…._I_ treated you back then. It was……" he started,

"Typical teenage stuff," Neela smiled, "Ok, so you weren't technically a teenager, but we all know boys develop slower than girls" she teased.

"Very funny," he smiled, "but some of the stuff we did was pretty bad."

"Yeah," she agreed, "Coming home to find that you'd taken all of my furniture out of my room and hidden it all over the apartment building was something I could have lived without."

"Hey, that wasn't _my_ idea." Ray said holding up his hands, "Matt suggested it and he wouldn't take no for an answer." He said remembering what Jack had said the night before.

"Tell me about it," Neela said bitterly,

"What?" Ray asked,

"Nothing," Neela said cursing her slip up, saying things like that was going to give her away.

Ray looked at her and knew that once again she was keeping something from him and wished he had the courage to make her tell him.

"So did you really make all of this?" she said trying to change the subject,

"Why? Do I get extra brownie points if I did?" he asked back to his playful self,

"Maybe," Neela grinned,

"Then _maybe_ I did," he smiled picking up the plates. Neela laughed and stood to help him,

"Ah ah," he said shaking his finger at her, "You sit, I clean," he said motioning to the couch, "Go,"

"Well can't pass that up," she smiled, "Never know when it'll happen again,"

"Funny," he said as she walked away from him and he walked into the kitchen. He put the plates in the sink, turned on the water, turned it off again and starting walking back to her.

'**Come on Ray, three little words, you can do it.'**

"Neela?" he said as he stood behind her, "Neela?" he repeated when she didn't answer.

He leaned over the back of the sofa and smiled as he saw her lying there fast asleep, her head resting on his sweater as a pillow.

'**Just my luck.' **He laughed to himself as he got her a blanket,


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Thanks for all the great reviews, greatly appreciated. Hope you like the next chapter**

Chapter 8

Neela woke up on the sofa the next morning and stretched out her feet knocking a piece of paper of the edge of the sofa. Closing her eyes she lay back down on his sweater and inhaled the scent of Ray.

'**If anyone saw me right now they'd have me committed.'**

Sitting up slowly she picked up the paper from the floor and widened her sleepy eyes so she could focus on it.

_Neela,_

_It's been a long time since I had a girl fall asleep on me but I have a healthy ego, I'm sure I'll get over it _

Neela smiled to herself, he certainly did have a healthy ego and the smiley face he had drawn was so childish, so Ray.

_Hope you don't mind that I left you on the sofa but I didn't want to risk waking you up. Hope you have a good day off, don't worry about the dishes I'll do them when I get home. And before you raise your eyes at me, I will do them, I only left them last night so I wouldn't wake you._

Ray had felt bad about lying there, but it was partly true, he stopped so he could tell her that he loved her, after that, dishes just didn't seem important and he hadn't wanted to disturb her

_See you when I get home,_

_Ray_

Neela held the letter up to her eyes and tried to make out the smudge before his name, wondering what he had rubbed out; surely he hadn't spelt his name wrong, not even _he_ would do that.

XXXX

'**Love Ray?'** his subconscious mocked him**, 'Love Ray? _Love_? Are you an idiot. What the hell did you write that for?'**

"I don't know," he mumbled to himself,

"Don't know what? Is something wrong?" his patient asked him,

"What? Oh no," he said realisation dawning, "everything is fine, I was talking about something else. Excuse me, I'll be right back."

"Hey, you okay man?" Pratt asked him, "You've been walking around like an extra from dawn of the dead all morning."

"Yeah, I'm fine," Ray smiled, "just a little distracted."

"Uh huh," Pratt said, distracted himself as an attractive woman walked by. Ray just laughed, he was a sucker for any woman that walked through the doors. He smirked as he remembered the rumour that he'd flirted with Neela when she first started, that was too crazy to be true.

"Put your eyes back in your head buddy," Jack said as he followed the woman through the doors, "she's taken."

Pratt held up his hands and walked away but not before taking one last look,

"She's with you?" Ray asked in disbelief,

"No," Jack smiled, "but a guy can dream right?"

"Don't you guys have better things to do than drool over women you can't have?" Abby asked,

"I don't," Ray smiled, pointing at his friend, "It was all him,"

"Right," Abby said, "So what do you call what you do every time you see Neela then?"

Ray stood in stunned silence, was it that obvious?

"She has you there," Jack smiled before turning to Abby,

"Hi, I'm Jack," he said extending his hand in his most charming manner,

"I'm not available," she said taking his hand and gesturing to Luka, "but nice try anyway."

Jack winked at her and smiled, looking back at Ray who was still in a daze,

"Snap out of it!" he said clicking his fingers,

"Come on Ray, did you really think we couldn't tell?" Abby asked, "I can't believe how oblivious you and Neela are."

"You haven't said anything have you?" he asked desperately,

"Do you really think you'd still be sleeping _across_ the apartment from her if I had?" Abby asked shaking her head,

"What's that supposed to mean?" Ray asked, he had an idea what she was implying. Jack had said as much before, but he didn't dare hope.

"Take him out of my sight," Abby laughed playfully, "before I have to start beating sense into him."

"Come on buddy, we need to talk," He said as he ushered him out of the door,

"So you haven't told her yet then?" he asked as they approached Matt,

"Told who what?" Matt asked,

"Nothing," Ray said, not wanting to discuss this with him, talking about how much love someone with their ex-lover was never a good idea.

"So what brings you by?" he asked desperate to change the subject.

"Well, it's our last night," Matt said, "we thought we'd do something together."

"Sure," Ray said, "What did you have in mind?"

"Nothing much, just a couple of drinks, hang out." Jack said,

"Sounds good," Ray agreed,

"Great! Your place tonight then," Matt said patting him on the back,

"Well actually…." Ray started thinking about Neela,

"Something wrong?" Matt asked,

"Um…. No," Ray said, "My place is fine,"

"Cool, later then." Matt said as he and Jack walked away.

Ray screwed his eyes shut and cursed himself, '**What did you do that for?'**

Neela wasn't going to be happy, but it was his apartment too, they had to share it.

'**You tell yourself that.' **He thought as he made his way back to work, dreading going home.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

"Neela?" Ray called as he dropped his bags on the sofa, "you home?"

"In my room," she called back instinctively wrapping the towel tighter around her. He may have been in the other room but she was always paranoid about being in the same building as him when she was half dressed.

Her daydreaming delayed her responses and she didn't hear him knock and open the door until it was too late.

"Ray!" she shrieked as he froze in the doorway, his eyes scanning her body even though his mind screamed at them to stop.

"Oh god, I'm sorry…. I knocked…. You didn't……" he trailed off taking everything in, her hair was pushed to one side covering her shoulder leaving the other one bare, the towel lay low on her chest showing just enough flesh to haunt his dreams for the rest of his life, his eyes drifted lower as they were attracted to a scar on her right leg.

Neela recovered from her shock and was slightly proud at his examination of her body,

'**Maybe I'm not as undesirable as I thought.'**

She tried to meet his eyes, but they weren't looking at her face, he couldn't tear them away from her legs….**'and my scar,**' she thought,

"Hmm hmm, Ray, my eyes are up here," she said,

"Sorry…. I wasn't,…. I mean I didn't mean to…." He stammered, embarrassed at being caught staring.

"It's okay," she smiled as he looked back at her, her hand tightening on the towel again, "you're not the first person to have that reaction, I'm sure you won't be the last. At least I _hope_ you won't be, I mean how sad would it be if you were the last person to ever……." She paused as Ray raised his eyebrows at her, "okay, let's not go there," she smiled nervously.

"Good idea," he said his voice almost a whisper as he looked in her eyes, "What happened?" he asked, not sure whether he should pry or not,

"Oh just an accident when I was a kid, nothing serious," she smiled,

Ray smiled back; his head telling him to look away from her but his eyes just weren't listening.

"Ray?" she said as they continued to stare at each other, something changing between them,

"Yeah," he swallowed his voice low as he took one step closer without realising it, his hands firmly in his pockets to remind him that he could look but touching wasn't part of their agreement.

'**Tell him how you feel,'** her mind told her,

"I …. l….. like you but," her voice chickened out at the last minute, "I'm not really that comfortable with getting dressed in front of you," she said, trying to sound casual but failing,

"Right……sorry," he repeated again, stepping back and shifting his weight uncomfortably, "I'll uh….. just uh," he stammered as he stumbled back in to the door, "wait outside," he finished cursing his clumsiness.

"**Way to impress her!"**

"Thanks," she said as she shut the door,

'**What the hell is wrong with me? Tell him how you feel? What a stupid idea."**

Ray sighed heavily as he leant against her door, images of her in just a towel rushing through his mind, followed shortly by pictures of her taking it off and ……..

"Calm down," he physically told himself breathing heavily, "it's never gonna happen."

He fell back on to the sofa and closed his eyes, which under current circumstances wasn't the best idea he'd ever had. Images of her danced across the darkness before him.

"You can open your eyes now," Neela joked as she saw him on the sofa, his eyes snapped open as he turned towards her voice, she was wearing jeans and a t-shirt now, which still managed to make her look incredibly hot.

'**How did I _not_ notice her in med-school?'**

"I'm sorry about that; I should have waited for you to open the door. It won't happen again." He apologised,

"It's fine," Neela smiled laughing it off, "we've lived together for almost a year now, it had to happen eventually right."

"Yeah I guess so," he agreed,

"So what did you want anyway?" she asked wondering what was so urgent that he had braved going into her room,

"Oh right…." Ray said biting his lip, bracing himself for her disapproval, Neela was up for having people over, but in _her_ apartment without notice was an entirely different situation, "well the thing is…….."


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

"_well the thing is…….."_

Neela folded her arms in anticipation, she could tell by his tone that she wasn't going to like this very much.

"They're leaving tomorrow, so Jack and Matt are coming over for drinks." He mumbled nervously,

Neela was so upset by the fact that Matt would be in her apartment, her home, that she completely missed the bit about the drinks.

"I'll be going out then," she said grabbing her jacket and heading towards the door.

"Come on Neela, don't go. You've been avoiding them the whole time they've been here."

"No I haven't." which was partly true, she was only avoiding Matt.

"Right, and I'm Weaver's favourite doctor," he said sarcastically, blocking her path to the door, "Look, is this because everyone knows about you and Matt, because you don't need to be embarrassed or anything."

'**Everyone knows?! He can't know! How? I didn't say anything. '**

"What are you talking about?" she asked nervously,

"You guys slept together, so what? If I was embarrassed around every girl I ever slept with you'd be the only person outside of work that I talked to," he joked,

'**Oh thank god,' **Neela sighed**, 'he only thinks we slept together, he doesn't know the truth.'**

"I'm not embarrassed," she said trying to get past him,

"Okay, so you're mad that he told then?" Ray asked, "It's been years Neela, no-one cares."

'**I care,'** she thought,

"I'm not mad at him, now please let me leave," she asked getting more and more agitated,

"Okay, so you're not embarrassed, you're not mad. What are you?" he asked, he wasn't going to let it go.

"Ray, just leave it please," she pleaded,

"No come on, tell me," he asked, not hearing the begging tone in her voice,

"I'm afraid of him, okay!" she yelled, "Just the sound of his name makes my blood run cold, the prospect of being in the same building as him makes me wish I was dead. Now you know, are you happy now?"

Ray just stood in shock; he'd never expected to hear that from her. Neela never admitted that she was scared and he couldn't think of any reason that Matt would scare her.

"Please move Ray, I want to leave before he gets here." She said reaching for the handle,

"No way, you're not going anywhere until you tell me what's going on." Ray said, he wasn't going to let her walk away this time; she had been hiding things for too long.

"No Ray, I can't," she said backing away,

'**I need to get out of here,'**

"You can tell me anything," he said putting his hands on her shoulders; he could tell she was still a flight risk.

"Not this Ray, not this. I can't tell anyone this" she said tears forming in her eyes,

"Please," he begged brushing her tears away, "I can't help if you don't talk to me,"

"Who says I want your help Ray?" she asked harshly, "I'm sorry," she added as he walked away from her hurt by her words, "It's just….. this is…… so hard, I don't even like remembering it let alone talking about it."

Ray just sat down on the sofa, he knew trying to convince her wouldn't work, it was her decision and nothing he said would change her mind.

"You really want to know?" she said sitting down next to him, "Okay," she said when he nodded, "but this is going to change everything."


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

"First of all," she started twisting her hands together, "I need to know what he told you."

"He said that you guys slept together and that …." He froze, embarrassed at about what he was going to say, "that it was…..good. We never got the chance to hear your side of the story because you left."

"_Good_?" Neela laughed coldly, "Son of a bitch, after what he did, I think he could have come up with a better word than good."

"What he did?" Ray asked, not liking where this was going.

"I'm only speculating," Neela said more calmly, she knew the only way she would get through this was to remain detached, "but I would imagine, when he told you his little tale, he left out one small but very important detail."

Ray just looked at her waiting for more, Neela shook her head unable to believe that he hadn't figured it out yet,

"I said no Ray." She finally confessed,

"What?" Ray asked confused, her meaning didn't sink in at first. His eyes widened in shock when it did, he couldn't believe that his friend would be capable of doing what she was accusing. But he couldn't believe that she would make it up either.

"In fact, I shouted it….. over and over and over again," she said tears falling from her eyes and her voice cracking, "but you weren't there, no-one came to help me."

Ray opened his mouth to speak but no words would come, he was silenced by confusion. Her words cut through him. _'you_ weren't there'

"You and Jack were out on one of your many infamous nights out." Neela continued, "I think that was why I avoided you both after I left, I was mad at you,"

"Wh….." Ray started but Neela cut him off,

"I know….. it was stupid. I had no right to blame either of you, you didn't know what he was going to do, but I wasn't really in a very stable frame of mind at the time."

They just sat in silence, Neela was waiting for a response but Ray didn't know what to do. Should he comfort her? She didn't seem upset. Should he get mad? Did he have the right to?

"I knew I shouldn't have told you," Neela said walking away, "I've ruined everything. I'm sorry."

"Neela wait," he said taking her by the arm and pulling her into his arms. "I'm the one that should be sorry, you caught me off guard. That was the last thing I ever expected you to say."

Sitting her back down on the sofa it was Ray's turn to be nervous, he wanted to know more but he didn't want to upset her.

"Why didn't you tell us back then?" he asked,

"You're kidding right?" she asked in disbelief, could he really be that clueless?

"What do you mean?"

"Things back then weren't like they are now; I could never have told you anything like this."

"Sure you could," he said hurt that she thought that he wouldn't have listened to her.

"Come off it Ray." She said standing up in frustration, "You weren't interested in anything I had to say, for the first sixth months we lived together you didn't even know my name. You had a very selective radar back then and I didn't register on it."

"Like you knew so much about me!" he said defensively, feeling guilty instantly, this wasn't about him.

"I knew a lot more than you think I did," she answered, "You seem to have a knack at picking places with thin walls," she explained,

She looked at the crestfallen look on his face and realised she was being unfair, that wasn't the only reason she'd stayed quiet,

"Okay," she said, "Maybe that wasn't all that stopped me. If I had told you back then, who would you have believed? Your best friend or the girl in the room next door that you only spoke to when you wanted to cheat off of her?"

Ray looked at the floor and then back at her not saying a word. He knew the what he would have done and that he would have been wrong.

"Exactly," she said, "You would have trusted your friend, which only goes to show what a good friend you are. You had trust, it was misplaced, but you had it."

"I'm sorry," he said, "for everything,"

"It wasn't your fault," she shrugged,

"Maybe not what he did, but not including you in anything, not getting to know you, that was,"

Neela smiled, "You make it sound like you were duty bound to be my friend or something. We were from two very different worlds, I knew that, I never expected you to be my friend Ray and I wasn't surprised when you weren't."

Ray looked at the hurt on her face and it destroyed him even more, things couldn't be more different now, he wanted to be so much more than her friend, but how could he after the way he had behaved in the past.

"I was upset though,"

"What?" He asked,

"I was upset that you didn't want to be my friend. You were so confident, so popular; you always knew exactly what you wanted and how to get it. You'll never have any idea how much I wanted you to notice me. God, half the time I wanted to _be_ you."

Neela looked down at the floor embarrassed by her admission, she sounded like a school girl with a crush again and she knew it.

Ray was stunned and flattered at the same time; he really hadn't had any idea.

'**She wanted me to notice her? God how could I have been so stupid?'**

"Why? I was a screw up, you….. you were so smart, you always knew everything."

"Yeah and look where it got me!" she said glancing around the apartment, "Single, alone and sharing an apartment for the second time with a guy that only asked me here so he could make the rent."

"That's not true," he protested, "Okay maybe it was at first," he said as Neela clearly didn't believe him, "but things changed, we're friends now…..aren't we?" He had to believe that, would she have told him all this is she really believed they weren't friends.

"I always liked to think so," Neela smiled, "but I was never really sure, we don't hang out or do anything that friend's do,"

"What about last night? Didn't that count for anything?" he asked,

"You think one meal together after years of knowing each other lets me know that I'm your friend? As far as I knew it didn't mean anything to you. I mean, even when _you_ sleep with someone it doesn't guarantee that you're ever going to talk them again, so what could a meal possibly mean?" Neela asked, one day she'd understand the way he thought but right now she had no clue what went on in that head of his.

"Then why tell me all of this if you didn't think you were my friend?" he asked confused and embarrassed by her words, she was right and that shamed him,

"Because…..because…" she stuttered,

'**I love you,'** ran repeatedly through her mind,

"Because I knew that even if you weren't my friend I could trust you to keep it to yourself," she half-lied even though she did trust him.

Ray walked up to her and took hold of her arms so they were directly in front of each other,

"You can always trust me, and just to set the record straight, you _are_ my friend."

Neela smiled and stood on tiptoes to hug him, she breathed a sigh of relief as he wrapped his arms around her, she'd told him her biggest secret and he hadn't judged her or run away from her the way she'd feared he would.

Ray pulled back and looked in her eyes, every fibre of his being screaming at him to kiss her. Neela could sense that something was different between them now and relaxed in his arms as he leant towards her, her heart pounding more loudly with every second he held her,

'_Knock, knock,'_

Ray drew back sharply as their _'guests' _arrived, and looked at Neela who had frozen in her place, fear taking over her body.

"Ray, you there? Let us in." came Matt's voice,

"I'm gonna kill him," Ray seethed as headed towards the door unhindered by Neela attempts at stopping him.

"Ray!" Matt smiled as the door opened, "Gonna let me in or what?" he asked his now ex-best friend,

"Or what!" Ray growled as he pulled him in and slammed the door.


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: Sorry for the delay, I am away from home at the moment so getting internet access isn't as easy as it usually is.**

"Woah! What the hell?" Jack yelled as Ray grabbed Matt by the collar and threw him to the floor inside the apartment.

"You son of a bitch!" Ray fumed as he picked him up and threw him against the wall, "How could you?"

"Ah I see Neela's been telling tales," Matt smirked as he saw her cowering in the corner,

"Don't you dare look at her," Ray said stepping between Matt and Neela,

"Oooh, the tough guy act," Matt sneered, "Keep it up Barnett you might turn her on, she always did like it rough,"

Ray snapped and before he could stop himself his fist sprang from its position at his side and connected with Matt's jaw.

"Ray don't!" Neela called out, she didn't want any more violence to come from what had happened,

"Yeah Ray, listen to your little bitch, wouldn't want you to get in trouble. What did she tell you anyway?"

Ray controlled himself despite his words, all he wanted to do was rip the guys head off but he could see how much it was upsetting Neela and the last thing he wanted to do was cause her more pain.

"You know I don't know why you're so mad," Matt continued, "I only did what she wanted _you_ to do."

Ray's grip on his shirt tightened as he pushed him harder against the wall, Matt's words finally registering with him.

"Yeah that's right," Matt said as he saw Ray's expression change, "If it had been you instead of me that night it wouldn't have been no she was screaming."

Jack who so far had been a silent observer to this encounter finally understood the situation and became filled with rage.

"You……" he started, "you……" he couldn't manage to say the words, the thought too devastating to imagine,

Ray, who was still reeling at the fact that not only did Matt admit what he had done, he seemed proud of it, took him by the arms and physically threw him out of the apartment.

"If I ever see you again, you're a dead man!" Ray said his voice icy and his eyes filled with hatred,

"Whatever man," Matt said picking himself and walking away, "You're welcome to her."

Ray slammed the door in his face and turned just in time to see Neela flinch, the sound bringing her out of daze.

"Neela…." He said as he walked towards her his hand outstretched, pulling back as she backed away from him,

"I'm sorry," she whimpered not looking in his eyes as she ran to her room and shut the door.

Ray hung his head and sighed, regretting his actions, his anger had clouded his judgement, hitting Matt had been satisfying but he hadn't thought of the repercussions it would have for Neela. She needed to be with someone she could trust to protect her, seeing him lose his control like that, wouldn't help her to believe that he was that person.

"Did he…..?" Jack asked, still not able to verbalise the action,

"Yeah," Ray sighed getting ice for his now throbbing hand, "That's why she left, why she wouldn't talk to us."

"I mean are you sure," Jack rambled, "because I've known him so long and I can't imagine him ever….."

"Are you calling Neela a liar?" Ray asked protectively,

"No of course not, I just can't believe that he would do that."

"Well he did," Ray said, "you heard what he said. Look Jack no offence buddy, but I think you should go…."

"Of course," Jack said grabbing his coat, "I hope she's okay."

"Me too," Ray whispered as the door closed and left him alone in the living room not knowing what to do or where to start.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 12 ... I think, my numbering got a bit messed up, but it is a new chapter

Ray pushed the door open gently not wanting to scare her,

"Neela?" he called softly as he saw her lying on the bed, and saw her turn her back from him,

"Talk to me…… please." He pleaded as he sat behind her on the bed. The sound of her crying cutting through him, placing a hand on her shoulder and turned her to face him.

"I'm so sorry," she cried as she the bruises on his hand, "this is all my fault."

"No," he said pulling her in to his arms, "don't ever say that. You're not to blame for any of this."

"If I hadn't told you, you wouldn't be hurt." She said lowering her head.

He tilted her head back up to look in her eyes, "bruises fade," he smiled, "it doesn't hurt that much anyway."

"Liar," she smiled through her tears,

"I should be saying sorry to you," he whispered stroking her hair as she leaned against him.

"What?! You were great." She said,

"I shouldn't have hit him…. At least not when you were there." He added, "I scared you and I'm sorry."

"I was scared of the situation Ray, not you. I've never been scared of you. You always made me feel safe, you still do."

He smiled at her and kissed the top of her head as he lay down beside her,

"I always will," he whispered, "I'm never going to let anyone hurt you again. I promise."

Neela smiled at the gesture but reality turned the smile into a frown.

"That's a nice though Ray, but you can't promise that. You're not going to be here forever, someday you'll meet the girl of your dreams." She said her eyes welling up again.

'**I already have'** Ray thought, he wanted nothing more than to tell her how he felt right then, to reassure her that she would be ok, but she had enough to deal with.

"You'll forget all about me," she sighed,

"Never," he whispered looking into her eyes, before pulling back. "I'll just be next door if you need anything." He said, assuming she would want some space.

"Ray would you…… forget it." She backed down,

"What?" he asked,

"Would you stay? Just for tonight." She said her eyes searching out his,

'**I'll stay forever'** he said to himself as he lay back down next to her and pulled her into his arms.

She snuggled up into his arms and rested her head on his shoulder, her hand over his heart, not knowing that his heart had been in her hands for a long time already.


	14. Chapter 14

A/N:So sorry this took so long, been stupidly busy, havent even had time to read fic. That's why no reviews. sorry.

Ray tossed and turned as Matt's words raced through his mind.

'_If it had been you…… wouldn't have been no she was screaming…..'_

Was that true? Would she have welcomed _him_? Would she still now?

'**Stop it.**' He told himself, he shouldn't be thinking that. He needed to take care of her, the way he should've before.

'**If you had been home, this would never have happened.'**

"Ray…. Ray," Neela whispered, rubbing his shoulder to wake him, "Wake up."

"What?" he asked as he sat up, "Is something wrong. Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, you were having a bad dream I think." She said searching out his eyes, but he kept his head lowered, avoiding her gaze.

"Look at me." She asked, but he kept looking down, "Ray." She insisted,

"I can't," he said, the words from his dream haunting him,

"I see," she said her heart breaking; "I knew I shouldn't have said anything. I've ruined everything. How can we be friends if you can't even look at me? If I repulse you so much."

"No Neela," he said his head moving up instantly, he broke as he saw the tears in her eyes, "that's not why, you don't…… you could never repulse me…. I can't look at you because….." he said dipping his eyes again, "because….. every time I see you now, I see the pain he caused you…. What I could have, what I should have prevented."

"Ray," she said sighing, "This is not your fault. I already told you that. You weren't even home."

"But I should've been. I should have been there, I should've protected you." He whispered,

"Don't be crazy Ray, you had no way of knowing." She said putting her hands on either side of his face so he had to look at her, "Don't do this to yourself, okay. Don't do it to _me_. I can't live like this, in the shadow of what happened. I need to move on, and you can do it with me."

He looked into her eyes, her words comforting him. He was being irrational, she was right, there was no way he could have stopped it.

"Okay," he smiled, "I meant what I said before, I'm never letting anyone hurt you again, I promise."

"Don't" Neela whispered,

"Don't what?"

"Make promises you can't keep. We've been over this, things are going to change, you're going to move on, we both are. We can't live together forever."

"Why not?" he asked, deciding now was the time, she'd confessed her secrets, now it was his turn "I don't ever want to leave you and I may have completely misunderstood the situation, but I don't think you want to leave me either."

"What are you saying?" she asked, needing to be absolutely sure,

"I'm saying that I…..that I never want to _live_ with anyone but you, that I never want to _be_ with anyone but you, that I love you, and I will do whatever it takes to make sure that you are safe and happy for the rest of your life."

Neela just sat there in shock, she had dreamed of this moment so many times and now it was here, it had to be a dream.

"If you don't feel the same way, it's okay, I understand, and it doesn't change the way I feel, I'll still be here." He said, her hesitancy confirming his fears.

"Why?……." she started,

"Neela just forget…." She cut him off as she started to talk over her,

"Why would you think that I don't the feel the same way?" she finished with a smile, taking a weight off his heart, "You just told me everything I've ever wanted to hear."

He put his hand to her cheek and brushed away her tears, her eyelashes tickling his hand. He leant forward until he was close enough to feel her breath and rested his forehead against hers as she smiled.

"Neela….." he started, but she put a finger to his lips,

"Enough talking," she grinned as she leaned forward and placed her lips gently over his. His contented sigh sending chills through her body as she pulled him closer, his hands tangled in her hair, his need for her surpassing his need to breath. He pulled back as the room began to spin.

"Wow!" He breathed,

"You could say that," Neela smiled, kissing his forehead, before looking in his eyes, which were glistening "I love you too," she whispered, "I always have."

"Yeah, so I heard." He smiled, "I know, I know, I'm a little slow right?"

"Just a little," she grinned,

"Hey I'm a guy, what do you expect?" he laughed as he pulled her into his lap and wrapped his arms around her.

"Well," she said raising her eyebrows and biting her lip before whispering into his ear, not wanting to waste anymore time,

"Neela Rasgotra!" he laughed in shock, "where did _you_ learn to talk like that?"

She raised her eyebrows at him, "where do you think?"

"I can see I've been a bad influence on you," he smiled, laying her down as he held himself above her,

"You think?" she grinned, pulling him down to her level, "You corrupted me!"

"I wish." He said cheekily,

Neela slapped him playfully on the arm as she caught on to his meaning.

"What?" he laughed, "I was just….."

"Ray, shut up." She smiled,

"Ooh aren't _we_ bossy." He grinned as she flipped him over and sat over him,

"You have no idea." She smiled, before leaning down to kiss him.

"Hmmm," he said pulling her closer and holding her against him as tightly as he could, flipping them back over.

"Are you sure about this?" he asked, he wanted nothing more than to be with her but not if she wasn't ready.

"Ray," she smiled, "I have never been more sure."

"Okay," he smiled against her lips as he kissed her again.

She ran her hands under his shirt, pulling it off easily. She ran her hands up his chest causing him to shiver as he leaned down to return the favour.

His eyes widened as he saw for the first time everything he had been missing, not only her body, but the love in her eyes. He smiled as he realised that it had always been there, he was just too blind to see it.

As the night wore on and they got worn out, they lay together dreaming of the future as the doors were closed on the past.

The End


End file.
